


Falling

by JensenAckles13



Category: Frostiron - Fandom, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Aftermath of Torture, Angst, Anxiety, Both of them need love, Fluff, Hugs, Kisses, Loki Needs a Hug, Loki has a heart, M/M, PTSD, Tony has a heart, Tony's alone, Ye be warned all who enter, love love love, mentions of torture, though he's mean at first
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-06-06
Updated: 2014-07-27
Packaged: 2018-02-03 14:30:56
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 6
Words: 4,545
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1747958
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JensenAckles13/pseuds/JensenAckles13
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>As it turned out, they both had something in common- falling. <br/>When Loki showed up in the middle of his room at 3 a.m. with black thread stitching his lips together and blood mixed with sweat and dirt coating his body, he was more than a little surprised. In fact, waking up from a nightmare to find a handsome and injured god standing in the middle of his room looking like a lost puppy surprised him so much that he’d promptly fallen out of bed, taking the bedside table with him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Lost and Found...Or Maybe Just Found...

If someone were to ask either of them what it had been like to fall, they would’ve responded in like- tedious, boring, time-consuming….of course that was nowhere near the truth…though time-consuming did come fairly close.   
To Tony, it had seemed like days, weeks, or even months. Given, he was unconscious- he would forever deny that he had been dead- and couldn’t remember what had happened, but watching and waiting for those terrible orange and red flames to chase away the remnants of an alien ship had been the longest moment of his life. It was only worsened by the lack of oxygen and the awful pain building in his chest. And then had come the blinding explosion and he had allowed his eyes to fall closed and succumbed to the horrible darkness that had tried to steal him away the moment he’d flown up into the wretched beauty of what he had once wanted so desperately to explore.   
To Loki, it had felt like an eternity. He was fully conscious of the terrible beauty his eyes sought out as he fell; he saw the beginning and the end of a world in one fell swoop. He’d had time to think- to wonder whether this had been his worst mistake or if it was yet to come. For the entire, breathless eternity, Loki saw what he never thought he could- life and death entwined in an explosion of orange and red, a man in red and golden armor falling through the starless sky, out of place even more so than the alien ship that hovered there. And then he was gone once more, floating away from the sight of the future and once more into the past, where he closed his eyes and let himself go, straight into the hands of the enemy. They’d brought him back, just as the Man of Iron had been brought back- through fear.   
If anyone ever asked Loki if he knew what would come; if he knew of his failure, he would’ve said no. He would’ve denied it until it was nothing more than a mantra of unsteady apologies to the ones who tormented him; who bent him out of shape and tortured him into submission. If he was asked if he had felt remorse as he plunged the blade into the Man of Irons chest, he would’ve said no, but in truth, he was raging with unveiled emotion, tears blurring vision that was usually so sharp, fury altering perception that was usually so ingenious.   
If anyone ever asked Tony if he’d fallen in love with the God of Chaos and Mischief, he would use his tongue to distract; use his endlessly flawless words to deflect from the question he had asked himself many times over, and denied the answer each and every time. He would tell you that no, he wasn’t in love with Loki. In truth, he _couldn’t_ be in love with Loki. He did not want his heartbroken, and Loki was a heartbreaker.   
But, as always, love triumphs over all, including ones rash decisions and weak attempts to deter.   
This would not change for the god or the mortal- fate always had a strange way of showing her power.

*

It had been a year and three days since the attack on New York, though Tony would fully deny that he had been counting the days that passed. That being said, it had been one year and three days since he’d decided Loki was everything he’d ever searched for and everything he’d ever tried to avoid. It was a vicious contradiction. He didn’t expect to see the god again. In fact, he was rather counting against it. So when Loki showed up in the middle of his room at 3 a.m. with black thread stitching his lips together and blood mixed with sweat and dirt coating his body, he was more than a little surprised. In fact, waking up from a nightmare to find a handsome and injured god standing in the middle of his room looking like a lost puppy surprised him so much that he’d promptly fallen out of bed, taking the bedside table with him. The shattering of the bottle of Jack Daniels that had been sitting there, coupled with the loud thump of the screwdriver that had been next to it was enough to startle Loki from his kicked puppy impression. Or perhaps it was Tony’s wild thrashing as he struggled to get out of the blankets that had entwined around him like some sort of silken serpent.   
It was when Loki raised a pale hand, a finger held up as if he were trying to tell him something, and then promptly keeled over that Tony had finally rid himself of the soft deathtrap he’d been wrapped in. He stared at the bleeding god for a solid five minutes, mouth agape and doing a very good impression of a fish, before he was spurred into action. He rushed forward, babbling at Jarvis to keep the house on lockdown and not to let anyone, I repeat anyone, know of what had transpired.   
His hands hovered above the unconscious deity, trying to figure out what, exactly, to do with a half dead god, before he hauled him- and wow, he was far too thin to be weighing this much- into his arms and set him rather unceremoniously into the bed. He rearranged long limbs into positions that looked more comfortable, which inevitably led to a spread eagled God of Chaos and Mischief facedown in his bed. Tony huffed to himself and rolled the god over, getting him relatively comfortable on the sheets that were currently being bled all over- oh, he was so gonna have to get a new mattress after this…come to think of it, maybe a new room- and quickly set to work finding where he was bleeding.   
It turned out, it was from multiple places. A gash that led from his brow to a sharp cheekbone, whip marks across his back, untraceable and ragged gashes stretching from his ribs to his hip on the opposite side…god, he was a mess. So he did what he could and began cleaning wounds with antiseptic he found in his large medical kit _(Bruce had insisted upon it after Thor’s incident with the toaster in the Tower)_.   
After he’d finished cleaning away blood and disinfecting and bandaging, the god was looking relatively normal once more, except for that damn black thread holding his lips closed. It was fitting, he guessed- the god unable to use his Silvertongue anymore. But that sure as hell didn’t make it alright.   
Very carefully- with no small hint of nausea- he cut the stitches and carefully pulled the threads from the god’s lips. He may or may not have run to the bathroom to throw up halfway through his procedure.   
Once he’d finished, blood had started to well and dammit he was not going to let the deity bleed out _after he’d saved him_. Instead he’d cleaned the wounds, but by the time he went to bandage them, they’d healed. Must’ve been some weird god thing that Tony was more than jealous of not having.   
Having done all he could do, he perched himself on the edge of the bed and waited. 


	2. Deal

When Loki awoke, it was not at all like it was in movies. Now, Tony would be lying if he said he had actually expected it to be, but a part of him had hoped.   
When Loki awoke, there was no flutter of his lashes against his cheek before the opening of his lids to reveal poison green irises and wide pupils that slowly roamed around the room to catch sight of the heroic savior.   
No, when he woke, it was with a scream of pure agony pulled from a hoarse throat and the tensing of lax muscles.   
It scared Tony so badly he’d fallen off the bed for the second time that night.   
He’d quickly jumped back to his feet with a cry of “Rudolph!” and a frantic wave of his hands.   
Fear, however, had already set in as Loki was pulled into the depths of his mind and trapped there, reliving whatever horrors that had pushed him to seek refuge with his enemy.   
Jarvis had long since turned the lights off; the only thing lighting the room was the dull glow of the arc reactor from behind the Metallica tee shirt Tony was wearing, and because of this, he couldn’t quite make out the god’s face. What he did see, however, was Loki sitting curled into himself. His legs were drawn to a stuttering chest, his arms curled around his knees, his face buried in them.

“Please.” Loki was begging now, his voice cracking. “Please, no more, no more, no more…..” It became an unsteady mantra of heartbreaking pleas from a broken god.   
Tony didn’t hesitate- he scrambled back onto the bed and wrapped his arms around the shuddering figure, holding Loki firmly to his chest. At first, he resisted, muscles tensing as he weakly tried to pull away. Finding out he was unable, he sat stock still.   
It was subtle at first- the slowing of his breathing, the relaxing of his shoulders. His arms and legs soon followed, unfurling themselves from their tight position. And then it was his back, the curve of his spine relaxing and resting. Loki’s head lolled to rest against Tony’s shoulder, glazed green eyes moving up to gaze at him through half mast lids.   
“Thank you.” It was whispered so quietly Tony almost missed it- would have, had it not been so quiet already. Tony didn’t respond; simply moved to stand. The god’s fingers fisted in his shirt, and Tony’s eyes once more sought out poison green ones, this time heavy with plea.   
“Stay.” Again, Tony almost missed it. But he didn’t. He simply nodded and moved to lean back against the headboard, taking Loki with him. The god fitted his head into the crook of Tony’s neck and curled into his side. Tony kept his arms around Loki, one around his shoulders, the other thrown across his waist. He toed his boots off and let them fall to the ground with a dull thud. Somehow, he maneuvered the pair of them under the blankets without dislodging the god that was clinging to his side. Resting his cheek in the god’s soft, raven locks, he murmured softly;

“Sleep well, Rudolph.”   
And somewhere, somehow, both of them fell into a dreamless sleep.   
It was the best Tony had had in years.

*

When he woke, it was to an indignant screech and whatever was warming him was torn violently away. He slowly blinked his eyes open, trying in vain to rid of the sleepiness blurring his vision without having to move. Seeing as how this didn’t work, he sighed and scrubbed both fists into his eyes until he could see properly. And what he saw shocked him into remembrance.   
Loki was half kneeling, half crouching on the floor, gazing up at Tony with wide green eyes and no hint of the trembling god he’d held in his arms last night.

“Wha’?” he slurred tiredly. God, it was too early for this shit. He hadn’t even had his coffee yet.

“Why am I….what did you….” Loki seethed, his eyes never leaving Tony’s.

“Hey,” Tony replied indignantly, more awake now as he sat and faced the still crouching god. “You’re the one who wanted snuggle time, not me. I just happen to like snuggling attractive and slightly psychotic Norse gods who try to take over the world, and then show up in my room at 3 a.m. and pretend none of it ever happened.”

“I assure you,” Loki replied after a pregnant pause in which he spent getting his temper back under control. “That was not of my doing.”

“Of course.” Tony pouted, pushing out his bottom lip. “And here I thought I was special.”

“You do know,” Loki said calmly. “I could rip your head from your shoulders before you could think about calling your dear Avengers, let alone complete the task.”

“Could, but won’t,” Tony replied, shrugging. Loki narrowed his eyes and stood, towering over Tony, fists clenching and unclenching.

“And what, pray tell, Mr. Stark, would ever give you that idea?”

“You’ve had plenty of chances, Rudolph. You could’ve done it while I was asleep. You could’ve done it last night during our alleged snuggle time. You’ve had opportunities and you haven’t taken a single one of them. _And_ ,” Tony added on, though this was more of a wild guess than anything. “You’ve just escaped wherever the hell you were and you can’t risk going back there.”   
Ah, there it was; the tensing of his shoulders, the straightening of his spine, the clench of his fists. Tony had hit that one spot on, and both of them knew he knew it.   
“You, big fella,” Tony continued. “Need some place to stay.”   
The breath let out between clenched teeth was more than a little annoyed.

“Alright,” Loki admitted. “I do come seeking refuge. Though it was never my intention to come seeking it _here_ , but as you are known for your security, I would ask you allow me to stay.”   
Tony pretended to think for a moment, though he’d already made up his mind. Hell, he’d made his decision last night. But then, he’d come to two conclusions. One, he was going to personally murder- or at least raise hell- for whoever decided it was alright to do that to Loki, and two, Loki needed a place to stay, and Tony had more than a little space to share.

“Alright, Rudolph. You can stay, but I do have some rules. No killing, harming, or otherwise disrupting the wonderful citizens of the world. If you want something, ask for it. Don’t go taking it because here? We call that stealing. And please, please, _pleaaaase_ do not go into my lab unless I’ve given you permission. Do we have a deal?”   
The smile Loki gave him was more teeth than anything.

“Yes, Mr. Stark, I do believe we have a deal.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey, at least Tony let him stay, yeah?


	3. Pizza?

Tony had retreated to his lab shortly after that, making sure to go over a few house rules.   
Focus, as it turned out, was not at all achievable.  
He was drawing up a new design for retro-reflective panels; stealth mode would make everything _so_ much easier. Well, it wasn’t new _per say_ , seeing as how he didn’t have any other design in the first place so really, this was a first and not a second, therefore not making it new….  
Oh, he was rambling to himself. _To. Himself_.   
He groaned, scrubbing a hand across his face.

“Jay?” he called.

“Yes, sir?”

“What am I feeling right now?”

“ _You make me smile like the sun,_ __  
Fall outta bed  
Sing like a bird,  
Dizzy in my head  
Spin like a record,  
Crazy on a Sund-”

The song was cut off with a wave of Tony’s hand as he scoffed at his AI.

“Funny, Jarv,” he grumbled.  

“I _have_ learned from the best, sir,” his AI supplied helpfully. He couldn’t help but huff out a laugh- damn Jarvis and his ridiculously human-like qualities that Tony was fairly certain he _hadn’t_ provided him with.

“Has your Jarvis just made a joke?” A cool voice asked from behind him.   
Tony jerked upright; slamming his head into the lamp he’d folded himself under, knocking it over. He swiveled in his chair, grumpily rubbing the back of his head.

“Don’t do that!” Tony hissed, glowering at the smirking god.

“He was referring to your tumbles out of bed, was he not?” Loki continued on.

“I don’t think you want me to remind you _why_ I ‘tumbled’ out of bed, do you?” Tony asked, tilting his head to the side. All he got in response was a glare.   
“Relax, Rudolph. Don’t get your panties in a twist.” He smiled widely at Loki, who was still gazing at him with narrowed eyes.

“I require sustenance,” Loki stated, his gaze never leaving Tony’s.

“Then go get sustenance,” Tony replied, raising a brow. Loki’s glare could’ve frozen Hell over.   
“Alright, alright, Jesus. Don’t smite me. What do you want? Salad? Pizza?”

“What in the name of Asgard is pizza?” Loki asked, sounding as repulsed as he looked. Tony’s eyes widened.

“You…oh god, you don’t have pizza in Fairy Land, do you?” he asked. “Jarvis, order us two pizzas- one with everything, the other with pepperoni and sausage.”

“Of course, sir.” A moment later, his AI’s voice rang out. “The order has been placed, sir. It should arrive in twenty minutes.”   
Tony nodded to himself, turning to face the god once more.

“Is that all?” he asked, fingers tapping absently away at his arc reactor. Loki didn’t say anything, instead moving his gaze down to the reactor, curiosity alight in his eyes.

“What is that? Why is it in your chest?” the god asked, perching himself on the edge of Tony’s work bench. Tony met his questioning gaze as he answered;

“It’s an arc reactor- an electromagnet. There are pieces of shrapnel trying to crawl their way out. This,” he tapped it. “Keeps them out.” Loki gazed at him for a moment and Tony could clearly see he wanted to ask more; too bad, he wouldn’t be getting any answers. At least, not until he got some of his own.

“What’re your nightmares about?” he asked, albeit hesitantly. He was tired of falling on his ass.

“What are _yours_ about?” Loki challenged, an eyebrow arched elegantly.  Tony’s own brow rose, and Loki elaborated, “You have dark circles under your eyes; you look exhausted. That is the look of a man who has been avoiding sleep like the plague.”   
Tony shrugged.

“I answered your question, you answer mine. I’m not gonna do all the talking here.”

“You already have been,” Loki pointed out, seeming unimpressed. Tony kept a steady gaze on him until he relented.   
“The Chituari,” the god finally said, spitting the words out like poison. “The merciless torture. Their ignorance to my pleas for death.” Loki stood then, stalking away from Tony, who only just figured out _maybe_ he’d taken it a bit too far.   
They were interrupted by the ring of the doorbell. Tony hurried upstairs and paid for their pizza, giving the young delivery boy a nice tip, considering he was serving the Menace of New York and didn’t even know it.   
He quickly brought the pizza’s downstairs, digging into one of them while shoving the other box towards Loki. The god gazed at it disdainfully for a moment before seeming to remember his earlier request for ‘sustenance’ and realizing this was all he would get. He then took a slice, sniffed at it, and took a bite with Tony watching him closely.   
Loki’s lips twisted before curling up at the corners, his nose wrinkling in an adorable way as he tried to figure out whether or not he liked it. After another bite, he seemed to come to the conclusion that yes, it was edible, and effectively finished off the slice in two more bites before taking another.   
They ate in silence for a moment, Loki seeming to be lost in his own thoughts as he chewed absently on his, what seventh slice?   
Tony eventually broke the silence.

“New York.”   
Loki’s gaze moved slowly towards him, taking a moment before focusing.

“Excuse me?” the god asked, brown dipping in confusion.

“My nightmares,” he replied, looking down at the napkin he was crumpling in his palm. “That’s what their about.”   
There was no reply.   
Tony chanced a look up at the god and saw something akin to….to _pity_ in those poison green orbs. Pity and, perhaps….guilt?

“I see,” Loki said after a moment, voice softer than before, not as biting. “That I was not the only one who suffered from such events.”   
Tony snorted.

“Of course you weren’t. Half the _city_ suffered. Do you know how many people you and your little army killed?”  he snapped, irrationally angry all of a sudden. The god comes into _his_ house, asking _him_ for a place to stay, and thinks _he_ was the victim?   
Okay, so maybe he was the victim a _little tiny bit_ , but _who_ was it that invaded the city? That killed thousands upon thousands of people?

“I know.” And Loki’s voice was so quiet, so resigned then, that all of Tony’s anger vanished. He looked up, meeting those guilt-ridden eyes with his own, and found he couldn’t hold the stare. There was something there that made him want to take the god in his arms, hide him from the horrors of the worlds and never let him go.   
But there was also that part that wanted to punch him repeatedly in the face.   
He did neither.   
He sat and gazed at the god until he couldn’t any longer, instead turning his eyes to the cooling pizza slice in his hand.   
When he looked up again, Loki was gone.   
And so was the box of pizza. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry, it's not a very good chapter, I know; I just had to get something up because I'm leaving the state for a week or two and won't be able to post. Sorry!


	4. Big Brother

The next time he got a visitor in his lab, it was most definitely not who he was expecting.   
Half his systems went haywire, and while he frantically tried to figure out the problem, it soon became obvious.   
There stood Point Break, in all his glory, his hammer hanging at his belt, and he did not look happy.

“My friend!” Thor boomed, strolling over and clapping Tony on the shoulder, nearly knocking him from his chair. “Loki has gone missing! We have reason to believe he is here on Midgard. I ask that you help track him down so we may bring him back to Asgard.”   
Tony turned to face the thunder god, biting at his lip.

“We’ll see about that….” He trailed off as none other than the missing god himself appeared in the room, mouth open as if he were about to say something, but freezing as soon as he saw Thor.   
“Well, shit,” Tony mumbled, scrambling to place himself between the two gods’.   
“Okay, no fighting in the lab!” he cried as Thor’s hand went for his hammer.

“Man of Iron, you do not understand….” Thor began, but Tony waved him off.

“No, no, I understand; he could rip my head off and smash it with his little finger, yadda yadda yadda. I told him he would be safe here, and safe does not mean getting smited….smitten….smit? By his older brother. That means,” he said as Thor went to protest. “No smiting.”   
Thor growled, legitimately growled, before letting the hammer drop onto the ground.   
The metallic sound of metal on concrete echoed loudly in the otherwise silent room.   
Loki was cowering, real and true cowering behind Tony. He’d bent himself down so he couldn’t be seen by the honestly quite intimidating Thor.

“You have offered him a place to stay? A….’safe haven’, as you Midgardian’s say it?”    
Tony nodded.

“Yeah, Point Break, a safe haven. That means, as long as he is under my roof, he is safe and you cannot hurt- or smite- him.” Tony turned to offer Loki a reassuring smile, but Loki didn’t return it, instead opting to peek over Tony’s shoulder like a scared kitten. Tony would’ve made some witty remark if Loki didn’t look honest to god terrified.

“Don’t let him take me….please, Anthony….” Loki murmured and yeah, that sealed the deal.

“Thor, buddy, he is staying right where he is, and if you don’t like it, suck it up and deal with it.”   
And maybe that wasn’t the best thing to say to the god of thunder but he really couldn’t bring himself to care.

“Please, my friend, I cannot leave you here….” Thor trailed off, looking down at him with those big, blue puppy dog eyes of his.

“No. He was held captive and tortured by _your_ people, therefore he will not be going back to _your_ people.”

“But-”

“Buddy, I’m not gonna sugar coat this for you. Daddy wants peace between the realms, yes? If he- or you, or anyone- tries to take Loki away from me, I will make sure to cut off all ties between earth and any other realm out there, including Asgard. You know just as well as I that I have more than enough power to do so, and I _will not hesitate to use it_. I ask you, then, if you are willing to wage war where it does not need to be waged?”   
Thor was looking at him with a mixture of outrage and admiration.

“You would wage war against the strongest force in the universe for _one man?_ ”

“Two things here, buddy. One; _you_ are not the strongest force in the universe; that was the Chituari, and who was it that beat them? Two; I would do that and _more_ for one man, one man who happens to be a god, and who also happens to be your brother.”   
Thor nodded grimly, picking up his hammer, though not defensively.

“I will speak with father. But if you do take up the task of protecting my brother, make sure to keep him protected. I need not see him in the dungeons any longer.”   
And with that, the hulking thunder god was striding out the door, disappearing from view, and Tony could breathe again.

“Holy shit, Rudolph; you’re brother is terrifying.”

“He is not my brother,” Loki hissed, stepping in front of him. “And I do not need to be protected by _you_. I am not a distressed maiden. I can take care of myself.”   
Tony narrowed his eyes.

“You want to go back to Asgard? Fine.” He waved a hand. “Go.” And perhaps that was a little harsh, but it seemed to get the god’s attention.

“No…I’m….” Loki took a deep breath. “Thank you. I…I think I will retire to my chambers for the night.”   
And with that, the god was gone, disappearing as if he’d never been there.   
Tony took a deep, steadying breath and hoped that he didn’t just start a war with one of the largest and fiercest fighting forces in the universe.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alright, so Tony may- or may not- make the smartest choices ever.   
> I'm...not really sure what I think of this chapter, but I knew i needed to get something posted since I haven't posted since last week.   
> I'm going to try to do a chapter a week, set up a new schedule. I'm not sure what day's, but there will be one a week.   
> Sorry about the poor quality of this one- it was written at one in the morning, and I was tired


	5. Chapter 5

Dear readers,  
For anyone who likes this fic, I'm sorry, but I have no idea where I was going/where to go with it, so I'm stopping it.   
If anyone wants to take it and pick up where I left off, feel free, just email me at kyli2006@msn.com to let me know.   
Thanks to anyone who's read/liked this- I really appreciate it, but I just have nowhere to go with it. If you like my writing, maybe check out my fic 'If I Fall'- which is finished- or 'Alone No Longer', which is one I'm currently working on.   
Again, my apologies.   
-Kyli


	6. Rewriting?

Dear readers,  
Recently I've been thinking of taking up this fic again. Currently, I'm writing the sequel to my fic 'Alone No Longer' which is titled 'Look After You'.   
I will be rewriting this fic after I finish my latest one, so keep your eyes out if you would like to continue reading this.   
Thank you to anyone who read this.  
Love, Kyli

**Author's Note:**

> I know this is short, I promise the chapters will get longer! Thank you for reading and remember, comments encourage me to write faster!


End file.
